Happy Birthday, the Big Three, oh...!

Dear Nicky,

Happy Birthday to the greatest little boy in the world! You're now three years old! We technically had a little party for you yesterday, but today is the big day. How far you've come and how much you've been through in such a short time. In your few years with us you've taught us so much about love and courage and dedication and family. Sure, you came as a surprise with some of your issues, but we can face any challenge as long as we do it together. You're a precious gift of a son, Nick, and never think otherwise. In other news, you also started your first day of preschool today. While your bus ride was a little longer than we'd like, and we're working on that, once there you did just great, just like we knew you would.

Love,
Dad

Almost D-Day...

Dear Nicky,

After only one day on your antibiotic, I think your ear looks drier already. We all went out for a nice walk this morning. You fell asleep in the stroller, then woke up as soon as it stopped. I had to abandon you guys with just Mom because I had to run into the A&P to use the bathroom. While you guys sort of napped, we cleaned up the house because company was coming over for an early celebration of your birthday. It was your girl cousins, Aunt Duchy, Uncle Jonny, and Granny and Granddaddy. You got some nice clothes, a toy ATV, and a bubble blowing machine. It was very nice and everyone was sweet to you. We had some delicious pizza, then cake and ice cream. The cake you ate very well with a fork all by yourself. Tomorrow you start Stones full time. It's the big leagues now, little buddy.

Love,
Dad

More antibiotics...

Dear Nicky,

After an extremely rough night with very little sleep for any of us, I took you to the docs this morning, where they gave us an oral antibiotic for your leaking ear. After a so-so nap and lunch, we took you kids down to Target, to get your supplies for Monday, then Kings for some victuals, then home, then dinner, which you ate nicely, then bed. It was a pleasant, mellower sort of day, and that's always welcome. Almost as welcome as a number of spontaneous kisses you gave me during the course of today!

Love,
Dad

Last EI...

Dear Nicky,

Today was your last therapy at home from Early Intervention. It was with Kim the OT. She's a very nice lady, but she was never on time. The session went all right, you were reasonably cooperative, and June was reasonably well behaved. Earlier this afternoon, you woke up from a nap with your head wet and a spot soaked onto the sheet. Still don't know what it's from. I hope it's just sweat and/or drool, and not something from your ear. Rob the PT called to thank us for the thank-you note we gave him. Also, the bus driver called to let us know what the pickup time would be on Monday morning. Mom pointed out it was way too early, and I should have questioned it. I feel stupid. After your OT, you guys swarmed around for a while, getting into mischief. You guys ate okay, then I put you to bed. All very anticlimactic.

Love,
Dad

Almost done EI...

Dear Nicky,

Today was your last day at the Stones EI program. Everybody brought in some treats to the group. It was quite a spread. You got a card with everybody's handprint wishing you luck when you start your full-time program on Monday. Then this afternoon it was your last session with Ellen the speech therapist. I wrote her a nice card and gave her a gift certificate to Barnes and Noble. Tomorrow I'll do the same with Kim the OT, and you will be officially done with all of Early Intervention forever.

Love,
Dad

Sun shiney day...

Dear Nicky,

This morning I took you guys to daycare for a little while. You guys always enjoy it, and the staff there had missed you. For you I think it was your last day for some time since you start preschool full time on Monday. It was very mild out today. When we came home we hung out on the deck for a while till Junie had a meltdown, then I put you both to sleep. As usual you didn't sleep so well unless I held you, which I did, gladly, and I think we both nodded off together. After a decent lunch we all went for a nice walk, then chatted with our neighbors for a little bit. You played with some of our neighbor's Matchbox cars, while Junie drank from everyone's drinking cup. Then I hauled you guys inside and fed you some pizza for dinner, which you ate nicely.

Love,
Dad

Happy day...

Dear Nicky,

You're definitely feeling better. You had a good time at Stones, you ate an okay lunch and dinner, and you finally had a BM. It was almost a week since your last one. So far tonight you're sleeping okay. The world just isn't right when you're not feeling well.

Love,
Dad

You do what you can...

Dear Nicky,

Sometimes in life, things don't always go the way one would like them to go. Things don't seem fair or easy. It's all right to get angry or frustrated or sad. It happens to everybody. At the end of the day, though, it's important to look back and be able to say you tried to do the right thing, you really tried to do what you could. Never give up, even if it means failure after failure, struggle after struggle. Never give up.

Love,
Dad

Happy Easter 2008...

Dear Nicky,

This morning you refused to nap, so you fell asleep in the car on the way out to Pennsylvania to go to Aunt Duchy's for Easter. Well, of course, when we get there you don't want to wake up, so you're out of it for most of the time there. Eventually, we put you in a guest bed where you finally fell asleep again for a little while, but you missed out on playing with your cousins and having anything at all to eat. Y'know, Nick, I love you and all, but I'm afraid we've allowed you to develop a bad habit or two, namely sleeping whenever you and you alone decide and when you're someplace new or different you turn into a lump of calamari. As soon as we got home, boom, suddenly you're feeling all better again. You're almost three, son; start acting like more of a big kid, okay?

Love,
Dad

To the docs again...

Dear Nicky,

You've had some goop draining out of your ear for a day or so now, so this morning Mom took you to the docs to check it out. It's the result of a cold, and it's just your ear tube doing its job, but it's better to be sure. You had a stomach bug and now you have some sort of cold or something, but you seem to be getting better. They gave us some Floxin drops for your ear to prevent infection. We went to Whole Foods this afternoon. I hate that place for the kind of people it attracts. Mom got in a fight with Granny today, so tomorrow will be interesting when we go out to Aunt Duchy's for Easter. Tonight we gave you some Triaminic, which helps decongest your nose and helps you sleep, which is the best thing when someone's sick.

Love,
Dad

The circus...!

Dear Nicky,

You seem better today than yesterday, more talkative, less listless, but you've had some copious amounts of what looks like ear wax coming out of your right ear. Quite a bit this morning and quite a bit this evening. I'm hoping it's just extra ear wax coming out and not some kind of infection. Well, that's what the ear tubes are for anyway, right?

This afternoon we went to a circus! We dropped Junie off at Granny's and you, me, Mom, Granddaddy, Aunt Za, and Cousin Noah went together. It was great and you really seemed to enjoy it. Clowns, ponies, dogs, acrobats. It was quite fun, and I'm glad I got to go with you to your first circus experience. You were very interested and well behaved. Toward the end you were pretty tired and went to bed as soon as we got home. We had a nice time together, and I hope you don't have another ear infection.

Love,
Dad

Lethargy...

Dear Nicky,

You have a bug all right. Went to the docs this morning. You've been quite lethargic and tired all day. I went to Stones anyway for the intake meeting, which was a breeze. Junie's ear's all better. You're wiped out, and I'm wiped out from yesterday, but at least you're not throwing up today, and you are drinking water. So this thing'll just have to run its course.

Love,
Dad

Rough day...

Dear Nicky,

Now you're sick. Junie's still sick. I hate it when my kids are sick. I'll tell you more about it when I'm not so tired.

Love,
Dad

The bug...

Dear Nicky,

Well, you just threw up a bunch of times. It must be the same bug Junie has. With her, the puking only lasted a very brief time, but now she's had the runs for a couple days. If it works the same on you, you'll be done puking but will have the runs all day tomorrow. Or maybe not. Who knows? On a lighter note, your school pictures came back today and they look amazing. I can't believe how nice they turned out. I think they were the best in the whole school. I bet the other parents were jealous. Hope you feel better!

Love,
Dad

Crunch...!

Dear Nicky,

So this afternoon we went out for a walk in our new stroller. It was a very nice day, bright and sunny, but cool. We walked nice and leisurely and were out for almost an hour. You guys got lots of vitamin D, I'm sure. But toward the end of the stroll, I look over at you and say, "Just checking on your glasses, pal," because you've shown a tendency to throw them off at inopportune times. A second later, I step on something and hear a loud crunch. It was your glasses. My mentioning the word "glasses" must've triggered your desire to toss them. I didn't even see it happen. Now they need to be fixed. Way to go. Junie's had the runs all day, by the way.

Love,
Dad

No dancers...

Dear Nicky,

Today we went to the library to see some Irish line dancers, but we got there a little late and it was too crowded and hot in the small room they had them in. So we went to Borders, which is just too hard with you and Junie together. You both require too much attention. So we drove around a little, then Junie threw up. I think she got car sick. We got home and cleaned her off, then later we all went to bed. I don't know why, but I'm so tired all the time.

Love,
Dad

Busy Saturday...

Dear Nicky,

We accomplished a lot today. But the day started off with you eating nothing for breakfast. Then you guys went to Music Together with Mom and where you always have fun. You napped okay, then ate some Annie's stars, then you guys went to Granny's. I heard you went to the King of Morocco's house and threw a bunch of rocks into his stream. That'll show him who's boss. I cleaned up, did some laundry, assembled a new stroller, got some groceries, and bought an air pump with which to inflate the stroller tires. Pretty productive.

Love,
Dad

Great work...

Dear Nicky,

It really seems like you've turned a corner in your walking. You really seem to want to do it more and more lately. We're so happy and proud. At last you're making serious, pardon the expression, strides. In other news we broke the news that we are sticking with Stones to our case manager. No problems.

Love,
Dad

The Kohler School...

Dear Nicky,

Today we went down the mountain to take a look at this school as a potential pre-school placement for you. I've got to say the facility was top-notch, modern and very clean. It was roomy and well designed. There were many compelling aspects to it, that's for sure. However, ultimately, I don't think it's the right place for you. See, the T21 population is a small percentage there, while the rest of the kids have autism, PDD, or CP. Now, one might say that exposure to the variety of behavioral models might be stimulating, but I believe the lack of homogeneity makes for too unfocused a learning environment. At Stones, everyone is taught the same way because everyone learns the same way. The other school was a lovely facility, though, and it makes this decision very hard.

Love,
Dad

Every day...

Dear Nicky,

Every day and every way, you're walking better and better. You guys didn't nap so well today, but you ate pretty good and went to sleep at a normal time. Nice.

Love,
Dad

Better than we'd hoped...

Dear Nicky,

This morning Mom and I went to our IEP meeting regarding your placement for preschool. Everybody was extremely nice. The meeting went very well, effective and brief. Before we went in, I was rather nervous, but once it got started I felt fine. They want us to take a look at another facility in Mountainside, but basically they said the decision would ultimately be ours. We're going on Thursday to check out the other place, and you'll be coming along. So far, so good.

Love,
Dad

Meeting tomorrow...

Dear Nicky,

Tomorrow we meet with the board of ed to discuss your IEP. Hopefully all will go smoothly. You were great today. That is all.

Love,
Dad

The day after...

Dear Nicky,

So, we were all tired today, and it turns out Junie has an ear infection, a particularly insidious one where there's actually a zitlike bulb on her eardrum. Holy cow! She was fussing all morning, so Mom took her to the docs and now she's on antibiotics and already feeling better. You're showing more and more desire to walk. Today we switch to (or is it from?) daylight saving time. That's such an antiquated concept. You ate quite well today. Mom and I had some Chinese food for dinner. Now I'm going to bed.

Love,
Dad

I'm a hero...

Dear Nicky,

So this evening, we went across the street to our neighbors for a St. Patty's day party. Unfortunately, the whole town lost power. Laurie came over to watch you guys while Mom and I went over, but I couldn't relax knowing that the sump pumps might be overloaded. See, we have an emergency pump that runs on battery power and acts as a backup, but when the power went out, there was so much water that the emergency pump was having a hard time keeping up. Basically, I had to bail from about eight to 1:30 to avoid the entire media room flooding. (I'm dating this for yesterday, as it counts as yesterday's post.) Then, at the end when it seemed the battery was exhausted, the power was restored. The flood was averted. Many times I felt like giving up, I felt like just letting the room flood. But I didn't. I kept going. Because of you. You inspired me. I've seen you so many times want to call enough with your therapies, but you keep going, because you're brave and strong and tough. And you've got to get it from someone. You and me, kid, we're stronger than we know.

Love,
Dad

The tour...

Dear Nicky,

This morning, Mom and I took the tour of the preschool program at Stepping Stones. It was very impressive. It looks well organized, well staffed, and fun yet challenging. I think it will be a very good place for you to learn and develop. On Tuesday we have our IEP meeting with the board of ed. I'm hoping we won't meet with much resistance. I doubt it, since they're all crazy about you.

Love,
Dad

Some days are better than others...

Dear Nicky,

Your nanny was here today, and that let me do a bunch of errands and such that I haven't been able to do since my appendectomy. Mundane stuff really, like going to Target and Stop and Shop, nothing special, but I just felt good, really good, for the first time in a while. It was nice, and you guys were nice too, so it's all good.

Love,
Dad

Model citizen...

Dear Nicky,

Well, this morning was picture day at Stones, and when we got there you had already fallen asleep in the back of the car, which made me think, oh no, he's going to be all grumpy and discombobulated. But you came right around, and took right to sitting in you seat for speech therapy. Then when picture time came, you looked good and you did great, you seemed very happy and comfortable and did a lot of smiling. Then you returned to class, then came walking out to me when you were done. Then later you did well with Rob the PT, so it was a very nice day on many levels.

Love,
Dad

Mondays are hard...

Dear Nicky,

You were up way too early today, napped poorly, and didn't eat much. But you did well with your PT and OT. We're seeing lots of progress with regards to your walking, and it's arrival is most welcome.

Love,
Dad

Visitors...

Dear Nicky,

We had some friends over this afternoon for a playdate. It didn't amount to much, but it was a nice visit anyway. You ate a great breakfast and lunch, so that meant no dinner. That's okay though. You're really grinding your teeth these days, and you're doing this weird thing with your saliva, making it really foamy. It's kind of weird. Knock it off, will ya? That's about it.

Love,
Dad

A day for haircuts...

Dear Nicky,

This morning I went and got a haircut, then in the afternoon we took you and June to a place in Summit. We were expecting June to have a meltdown, but she was fine. It was you who had the meltdown. Your behavior was embarrassing, frankly. At least both you guys' haircuts look pretty good.

Love,
Dad