New Year's Eve, 2006...

Dear Nicky,

Soon it'll be 2007. You've been asleep for hours now. I hope to be asleep in a few minutes. 2006 was a trying year and I'm looking forward to a better 2007. Earlier we went to Whole Foods and got a bunch of stuff. You were so well behaved and charming, smiling and waving to everybody. Tonight we roasted a chicken for dinner. It almost didn't happen because Mom cut her finger. It bled quite a bit, but it wasn't that bad. In 2007 I want to see you walk and talk and use a feeding utensil. Is that selfish of me? That's what I want. Won't you give it to me, my boy whom I love so much?

Love,
Dad

Okay Saturday...

Dear Nicky,

Nothing exciting to report today. Mom went out for a while this morning. You and I had some laughs. Junie got some tummy time, and she's eating two solids a day now, too. After Lunch, Mom took you both over to Granny's, but she brought you guys back because you were tired. I ran a couple errands. Then I put you both to sleep while Mom went and got some Chinese food. It was okay, but not great. Then we hung out, and now it's time for sleep.

Love,
Dad

Playdate...

Dear Nicky,

A little pal of yours from Stones came over with his Mom today. We all had a nice time, and you two guys played together very well. We had pizza, except for your pal who had yogurt, and Junie who had sweet potatoes and bottle after bottle of formula. Afterward, you were so tired from the excitement, you fell asleep in my arms. I put you down and you napped for about an hour, then we brought you down and gave you some avocado to eat. To stimulate your appetite and energize your overall mood, I played some Superman theme music on the computer while I made you fly through the air and leap high into the sky. You ate some, but not a lot, then we sent you back upstairs. You fussed a little a few hours later, but not too bad.

Love,
Dad

Ordinary Thursday...

Dear Nicky,

Not much to report today. Your nanny had you most of the day while Mom and I went out together for a while. We saw the latest James Bond movie, which was sort of okay, but it was too long and somewhat boring. Then we went and got something to eat. Then we went to Target. What a surprise. During your usual nightly wake up and fuss routine, which occurs anytime between nine and eleven, you woke up Junie, who has a bad cold and sent her on a crying jag for fifteen minutes. We know you don't mean it, though, so it's cool.

Love,
Dad

The day after Xmas...

Dear Nicky,

Yesterday was such a tiring day. And today was little better. Early this morning I opened a bunch of your toys. In order to reduce shoplifting, toys these days come wired into the packaging, which makes it hard and annoying to open them up, but what can you do? Your nanny came and Mom and I took off for most of the day. We went to the movies. We hadn't been to the movies together in over a year. Too bad the movie we saw was really boring. It was called The Good Shepherd, and it was about the CIA. Very boring! And long! Gosh, seeing it took up our entire morning. We also went to Target and got you some clothes, and I also got some rechargeable batteries and a memory card for the camera Mom got me for Christmas. We tried to see a James Bond movie, but it was sold out. Darn it! When we got home, Mom gave you an avocado to eat. Junie had a runny nose a little. We hope it's not what you had last week, but I don't think it is. You kids are way strong anyway, you can just shrug this stuff off.

Love,
Dad

Xmas 2006...

Dear Nicky,

Hey! Today was Christmas! You got lots of presents. The four of us had a nice, quiet morning at our house, opening presents and relaxing. Then later we went out to Aunt Dutchie's for what we thought was going to be lunch. When we got there in the early afternoon, everybody was still in their pajamas. We all got some nice presents again. We snacked for most of the day. It turned out we wouldn't be eating for real till much later, at almost six. You ate well over the course of the whole day. A bunch of quiche, some pineapple, then at dinner, mashed potatoes and pork. Sure you ate well, but it's hard to be at someone else's house for such a long time. Coming back, it was late, dark, and rainy. We put you straight to bed. It was a nice day. but it was nice to be over.

Love,
Dad

Christmas Eve 2006...

Dear Nicky,

Today we went out to Aunt Dutchie's house. First we stopped at a Borders bookstore on Rt. 22 to get one of your uncles some Dean Koontz books. Then, a few minutes before we got there, Junie woke up hungry and went insane, screaming and crying, which made Mom go insane. At our destination, we ate some and talked to a few people, then it was time to leave. The food was just okay and you guys were getting tired. Upon returning home, Junie started going crazy again, so I fed her while Mom gave you an avocado. I love it when you eat avocados because they're so good for you. Tomorrow is Christmas. I think Santa might have brought you some nice things.

Love,
Dad

It's a wrap...

Dear Nicky,

This afternoon you ate a whole avocado, which is so good for you. Then Mom took you and your sister to Granny's, where Aunt Za is visiting. You guys hung out there for a while, then came back around five. After we put you both to bed, we wrapped presents. Tomorrow we're going to Aunt Dutchie's for lunch. Your girl cousins will all be there and they're crazy about you.

Love,
Dad

Last-minute shopping...

Dear Nicky,

Mom took you guys to the mall today because she had to get presents for all our relatives, and also you guys love the mall. Granny came over earlier to borrow your old Pack n Play for Aunt Za and Cousin Noah; she was agitated by the holidays. I hung some pictures up in your rooms. And while you guys were out I snuck into town and bought Mom a present, too.

Love,
Dad

Xmas party at Stones...

Dear Nicky,

Today was the Christmas party at Stones. You enjoyed the music a lot and had a pretty good time. Some nice lady offered to hold you on her lap in the circle of kids for a while. I put you up on my shoulders a couple times, which you really seemed to enjoy. But sure get heavy fast, or maybe I'm just out of shape You got a present from Santa. We met this grown up T21 kid there, too. He seemed very nice. Earlier, during your therapies you were quite the pill, I'm afraid. But when we got home you took a 2 1/2 hour nap. Guess the party wiped you out. You woke up just in time for your speech therapy, and then you had some pasta and beef. You still seem a little tired but I'd say you're almost fully recovered from that bad cold this weekend. If none of the rest of us catches us it'll be a miracle.

Love,
Dad

Much better...

Dear Nicky,

Today you seemed to feel even better, which makes us so happy, but you didn't nap well at all, which is not good for you. Your behavior today was quite lively, albeit mischievous, which made for a slightly tiring day. So good night!

Love,
Dad

Better still...

Dear Nicky,

You're doing even better today. You slept pretty well last night, woke up and ate okay this morning, and then again for lunch. You did very well even with your PT, which is challenging enough under the best of circumstances, let alone when you're not feeling well, but you did great across the board. This evening I tried to get some more yogurt into you, but you weren't having any, so I changed you and put some more Vick's for babies on your chest, and read a couple of books to you. You'd get tired of the books and put them away yourself and take out others. Fascinating to watch. So happy you're feeling better.

Love,
Dad

A turn for the better...

Dear Nicky,

Well, you're not eating much, but your spirits are good, and you definitely sound better, so we're happy about that, of course. We canceled your PT for this afternoon because you needed the rest, and also we went to see the doc again, in order to make sure you don't have any ear infections or anything. But nope, ears are clean, lungs sound good. Your strong little immune system is fighting off this bug. Granny came over to watch June for a bit while you and I went to the docs. It took a while, and when we got home you were so tired you wanted to go to sleep immediately. Then just a minute ago, we got a call from Stones saying there's no school tomorrow due to a heating problem. We weren't going to go anyway, but it's kinda nice when they cancel it, like a snow day or something, y'know?

Love,
Dad

Long night...

Dear Nicky,

Last night was a long night because you were sick. You had a crouplike type of thing that seems to have cleared up, but last night and the night before you were really sick. I guess the peak was last evening. I was up all night. I took you into a steamy bathroom maybe half a dozen times in order to loosen up your chest so that you could breathe better. Yesterday was pretty worrisome, that's for sure. Today you seemed better, and tonight you seemed way better. So I hope we're out of the woods because I don't like seeing my boy sick

Love,
Dad

Sick day...

Dear Nicky,

So yesterday we went to the party at our next door neighbors' house. Very nice time, and very nice people. It was later in the evening so you and June were both asleep and your nanny came over that afternoon with her daughter, and the two of them kept an eye on you kids. Not that you needed an eye kept on you; you guys slept the whole time, but right around 11 o'clock or so, you had an attack of what seemed like the croup, with all the attendant scary inability to breath right. Well, last night we were up all night; it was very tense. This morning Mom took you to the docs, who said it's not croup, just like a bad cold or something. I don't know if I buy that. You slept most of the day today, which was good. We dosed you a couple times so far, but you don't want to do too much of that sort of thing. We also found that a steamy hot bathroom full of, er, steam is great for opening you up. Tonight we'll see how you do overnight. Be strong and healthy, darling boy!

Love,
Dad

IOU 8

Dear Nicky,

Another IOU, but I'm too tired to think straight. I cach up with ya later.

Love,
Dad

I'll always bear your burden...

Dear Nicky,

I just put you down after soothing one of your whining attacks that you sometimes get in the first part of the evening. You whine and you snuffle like you're having a nightmare. If it's not too bad I leave you alone and you soon return to your normal, peaceful sleep. Other times, it escalates to the point where I as a father have to come to the aid of my child. So while I was relaxing you just now, I told you that your father is always with you, and that I'll always bear your burden, happily, gratefully. Whatever I can help you with in this life, my son, I will. In case you didn't know it, you're an amazing boy. Yesterday at the end of the day I was too wiped out to write much, and I have to go to sleep soon, but just let me say how well you did in OT yesterday, and at Stones this morning, and with your ST this afternoon. Tonight for dinner I made us breaded fried chicken cutlets with broccoli and couscous. It didn't take long at all and it came out very nice. You ate an entire chicken cutlet. Mom would put a piece on your tray and you would pop it into your mouth. One time you even dropped a piece onto your cushion, yet you found it, picked it up, and ate it. You're very special.

Love,
Dad

IOU 7...

Dear Nicky,

I'm too tired to write anything now, so I'll write you tomorrow.

Love,
Dad

Very effective...

Dear Nicky,

I'm thinking the avocado you've been having for four days now is a real wonder food. I don't know for sure if it's that, or coincidence that your cheeky are rosy and your energy level is tremendous. At Stones it's always a crapshoot if you're going to be too tired for OT or speech after your PT, but today you did well in PT and OT, really well. You were cheerful, chatty, engaging...just excellent all around. And you did the same again with your home PT. Maybe you thought you were playing instead of working, and that's great. And your PT is clearly pleased with the progress you're making. And so are Mom and I. We're so proud of the courage and character our little boy can display so naturally. You should be very proud of yourself, my darling boy.

Love,
Dad

Wipe me out...

Dear Nicky,

Boy, pal, you and Junie didn't give me much of a break today. It seemed like neither one of you wanted to sleep a wink. I guess your teeth are bothering you, but you didn't seem like you wanted to eat much, though you did eat a whole avocado, a graham cracker, a yogurt, and some sweet potato with cereal. You did do very well with your PT, however, interacting happily and cooperatively, and that was great. It makes think you will walk by the summer, if not sooner. But both you kids plumb wore me out, so I was very happy to put you both to bed early.

Love,
Dad

Afterparty...

Dear Nicky,

We were all sort of tired today because after last night's company left, Mom and I still had to clean up, which took a while. Today was just spent mostly hanging out. The most noteworthy thing was that you took a three hour nap. Kid, that was great, I wish you'd take more like that. It's so good for you to get plenty of rest. If you slept as much as Junie sleeps you'd be six feet tall by now. In the afternoon we went for a drive and a walk through a nearby park, but it was too cold for me to enjoy and Junie started crying and it's just a pain to deal with sometimes because she won't stop. We came home and you had a whole avocado again, then I had to take a catnap, then you and I had a bunch of laughs, then I put you to bed.

Love,
Dad

Company...

Dear Nicky,

This morning you ate a whole avocado for lunch. Those things are so good for you. This evening some friends of ours came over for dinner. It was two couples, an older pair and a younger pair. The latter brought their 9 month old twin girls, who were cute but not as cute as you guys, nor were they as big as Junie, who is half their age. Dinner was great. Mom made an excellent beef stew, and you ate a generous serving of it, chowing down well on some hearty meat and potatoes. You interacted well with the other kids. You and June were the cutest and the best behaved. The couple with kids left fairly early, while the older couple blithely remained. Man, did we have a lot of dishes to clean. It was nice though.

Love,
Dad

Mom's home...!

Dear Nicky,

This morning you woke up a little early and very loudly demanding my attention. You must've been hungry, because last night you didn't eat much. You ate better today, but before that, around eight o'clock this morning, you and your sister both had a whinefest for quite a while. Made my head hurt. After a nice lunch, you had a massive "accident," you know the kind I mean. I guess you must be eating more than we think! After I cleaned you up, I took Junie up to change her, and when I came down, Mom was home! You guys are spared from me all by myself. She missed all of us, and was so glad to be back from her trip. Later, we fed you a bunch of meat tortellini, which you ate well. Then Mom read you a story and put you to bed.

Love,
Dad

Cold weather coming...

Dear Nicky,

Right now I'm watching the original Star Wars movie. It's the special edition, so it has new effects and visuals, which don't necessarily make it a better movie, but it's still a lot of fun.

Yesterday I was totally alone with you guys for the whole day. I decided to keep you home from daycare, and I'm glad I did; there seems to be a terrible a stomach bug going around. Everybody else in your group at Stones must've had the stomach flu, too. It was just us out of our section. Anyway, you, me, and June were just fine with only the three of us. And today your nanny came, which makes it easier to do stuff. However, you seemed tired and uninterested in being at Stones this morning, and with your speech therapist this afternoon. Oh well, you're allowed. You sure are grinding your teeth something awful though.

Tonight you didn't seem much interested in eating. It's supposed to get really cold tonight and tomorrow. We're well stocked and should be able to make do till Mom comes home tomorrow afternoon.

Love,
Dad

IOU 6...

Dear Nicky,

Today was a long day and I should have gone to bed earlier. I owe you a post.

Love,
Dad

Just me...

Dear Nicky,

This morning Mom went off on a business trip and won't be home till Friday. You're nanny got stuck in traffic, so she was a little late, which meant that you and I couldn't leave for Stones. She wasn't that late, and we left at about twenty of, and made it with minutes to spare. It's so nice not to deal with that monstrous traffic on Route 280 anymore. At Stones, it was just us out of our little group of three, and I left you with the therapists in order to go do the group thing we adults are doing once a week. We had a guest visitor, and it was hard to get a word in edgewise. We came home and you went to sleep. I made you your lunch and stuck it in the fridge for later and your nanny fed it to you. You were much better with your PT this afternoon, who took it easier on you because you were so unhappy yesterday. Then I patched you, fed you a nice big bowl of pasta and a yogurt, played and laughed with you quite a bit, then off to bed with you, which is exactly where I'm headed right now. I'm going to need my strength.

Love,
Dad

Pizza...!

Dear Nicky,

You barely ate anything for breakfast, and I wanted you to eat well for lunch, so I think I overfed you. You were whiny most of the day, then really cried when it came time for PT. Mom went to the chiropractor twice today because her back was killing her since Friday and finally in the evening she was feeling a little better. She was worried because tomorrow she has to go away for a business trip and she needs to be on top of her game. Mom works very hard to take care of us. When she came back from the chiropractor the second time she got us pizza, which was delicious, and you ate a very good sized piece. You clearly thought it was delicious.

Love,
Dad

Xmas fotos...

Dear Nicky,

Today Granny came over to take some photos of the four of us so we could use one for this year's Christmas card. It was nice of her to do, and we got one we could use, but oh my gosh, your granny cannot work a camera or compose a photo to save her life. That we got anything halfway decent at all was a Christmas miracle.

We gave you a bath this morning, then you took a little nap after the photo session, but you've been very whiny all day. For dinner we had some cheeseburger macaroni, which you ate quite a bit of, after doing your initial "No I refuse!" sort of thing.

We sent the photo out to be made into a card and we should get them in a couple days. I think it'll look nice, and Mom put a nice message in there, so we're good.

Love,
Dad

Up too late...

Dear Nicky,

I've stayed up too late, now I'm going to be all tired in the morning. You're doing great with sitting now, like in and out of it effortlessly! Busy day tomorrow...

Love,
Dad

A warm December...

Dear Nicky,

Today was December 1st. It's supposed to be really cold this time of year, but instead it was ridiculously warm. It was cloudy and dark all day, a good day for sleeping. This morning Mom took you to Music Together while I stayed home with your sister. Then you guys came back, Mom had some errands, and I gave you some yogurt and you went to sleep for some time, a couple hours at least. You've really gotten the whole prone-up-to-sitting thing down effortless now. It's just amazing. You do it like you've been doing it all your life, but it's only been a week. We were going to go over to some people's house for dinner, all four of us. Mom wasn't really thinking when she accepted the invitation. You and June are pretty much done for the day after 4:30, and it would've have been hard on everyone, especially when June screams her head off when she wants to go to sleep. Also, there were tornado advisories and high winds, and it didn't seem like such a good idea to go out at all. So we bagged it, put June to bed, and fed you some lentils for dinner, which you loved. It was better this way.

Love,
Dad