Lame function...

Dear Nicky,

So today was a fundraising type of function for Stones. All four of us went, but only after I finished a bunch of lawn work, which I secretly enjoy, so don't tell Mom. I dug up some thatch, then mowed, then trimmed. Then I applied weed and feed and insecticide and watered the whole lawn. Then I sprayed ironite on all the shrubs and trees, which should make them healthy and green. Anyway we got to this dump of a banquet hall in a dump of a town. There were no ramps or elevators so it was basically inaccessible to strollers. We went in, then had to go all the way back to the Honda to put the stroller back and carry you heavy beasts in by hand. The turnout was pathetic and the food was nothing to write home about, but you ate a big chicken finger and grooved to some tunes. I was glad when we left. We went to the mall after. Mom got a pair of shoes. I got a vanilla faux coffee drink. It was too sweet. Then we came home. Mom took care of you guys while I lowered Junie's crib. Man, it took a long time and was hard work. I don't know why they insist on using hex screws on some furniture. It was a pain in the butt.

Love,
Dad