Getting close...

Dear son,

I'm still trying to straighten up the house, but we've got just about everything we'll need for your arrival: car seat, stroller, clothes...even a Diaper Genie. Boy, I hope that thing works right. It's like a sausage maker, but instead of meat you use dirty diapers. A crib and changing table are on their way. I hope they get here in time, otherwise you'll be sleeping in a bassinet till you're about eight years old. Not to worry, I'm sure they'll get here in time. Kindly make sure you do the same.

Love,
Dad